Posts Tagged ‘Memories’

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Remembering you, remembering me, remembering us but then again there was no us, just you and me walking through life in different direction until our path cross and everything has changed. It was a crazy roller coaster ride. It was a year I will never forget because truth be told meeting you was the best thing that ever happen to me, but then one can’t help the sad moments in between. The confusion, the longing, the misunderstanding and unmet expectation were just but a few of those not so good feelings I’ve felt that made me do some crazy stuff with myself. Of course there were those regrets that comes too late but then I didn’t blame you for anything that time because it was a choice I’ve made and I was too scared to take that leap of faith with you.Oh yes I did not believe in you and me, I don’t have enough faith to see where it would have lead us, but still for everything that happen I could never ever regret meeting you and loving you is just something I have to do with this cold heart of mine. Yeah I’m a cold hearted kind person never allowing myself to love that deeply but sometimes even if we feel we’re not capable of loving, somebody will definitely come that will sweep us off our feet not literally of course but I know it will just happen sooner or later.

It was good memories but I know we’ve move on with our lives cause it’s been years that we haven’t seen each other and on my part I’ve no more illusion of wanting forever with you because I have long accepted that fact and I’m fine with it. But I guess there are some memories that will forever stay with you no matter how long time passed no matter where you are in your life. Many things have happen to me since we last saw each other I meet few men some of them were good, some were bad but in the end it didn’t workout and it leave me empty handed.

I guess I was burnout with everything that happen that I choose to stay away from it all it’s not denying one self but it’s liberating one self that somehow despite how needy you might become with someone to the point of desperation you can actually give yourself some space, give your self some time to heal from the wound and be free from the past. Healing takes sometime and coming to terms with your past also takes time so people can’t blame me if I rather choose my own company right now than be in a some kind of relationship which I’m not ready to go into.

They say life would be happier when shared with a loved one your world could suddenly turn to a colorful hue and who am I to argue that but I also say happiness is a choice and a state of mind it’s not actually a feeling it’s a decision you make for yourself whether you want to be happy with or without a man in your life.

Anyway this post is quite long and a bit emotional I guess the rain always did this to me I always remember times that past and I remember people that matter and I sort of kinda miss them.

I thought I’ll be the one to ease the pain she left behind.

I thought I could fill the love that’s been void since she left you.

I thought I can be the sunshine to warmth your cold days.

I thought I can be the rainbow that brings color to your gray days.

Then I realize I could never be all those things and replace what you’ve been missing all along.

I am me and you are you

If our life did crossed path and entertwined

Not because we are meant to have ever after

But all we could have is shared moments

Moments I treasure, Moments I love but I know

I am not meant to be your ever after

We could never have that

I am just an air who once passed your life

To breath some fresh air, to bring new memories

But leave when the time comes

And you are my angel

Who’ve once touch something special in my life

At the darkest moment and loneliest days

Youy presence comfort and cheer me up

But time has come when the air needs to leave your side

And you my angel needs to go to someone who needs you more

We can’t have our ever after cause all we can ever have are precious moments

11-19-11 5:17pm