Archive for the ‘Forgiveness’ Category

__A_real_sad_love___by_Derzorvadur

At times like this I want to cry so bad because you’re the only one who can make me feel both happy and sad. Yeah its very confusing and so mind boggling to decipher why I always feel this way. My friends keep on telling me to let you go if you’re making me sad but stubborn as I am, I can’t quite accept the fact that if I do just that then forever you will be gone from my life. But how can I let go of the one person who can make me feel so happy for no reason at all. I guess its true what they say that love can make you blind because although at times you’re too insensitive to my feelings, never knowing that I’m hurting because sometimes you just ignore me. You seem too callous by the way you’re treating me as if I’m a person without feelings. Of course, I know I’ve had my fair share of regrets for the things I did or did not do before but can we just forget and move on to the future. I know what we have right now is quite confusing we’re neither lovers nor good friends but I know deep in our hearts there is a bond that other people can’t quite understand. I can’t quite let go of you yet and vice versa. I know you’re not as cold as you pretended to be because when at times I get angry and stay away from you, you’ll always find ways that I won’t stay mad at you for long. I guess it’s one of the reason why of all the people I’ve meet you’re company is what I’ve been longing for most of the times. All I wish is that someday may we find the courage to both talk whatever we are feeling for each other and to forgive each other of the hurt we cause. I love you before and I still love you now. And  I hope time will be kind and erase the sad moments in between and just bring back the happy days I always felt with you.

Advertisements

Forgiveness is sometimes hard to give especially if you’ve been hurt so deep by the person you love. The one whom you think your world revolves around that you envision yourself to spend a lifetime together. Then, out of nowhere they suddenly disappear leaving you behind with a lot of questions and a hurt so deep. Yes indeed it is time that heals the wound and make you move on to forget the memories, the pain of the betrayal and maybe look up to a new future. The future that could possibly bring a new love, a new hope, a new beginning but what if suddenly the person who cause you all those hurt suddenly reappears.

It is a dilemma especially if you are starting to pick up the pieces in your life and the wounds started healing. You thought you have forgotten him and have moved on but why do just a mere hello turn your inside to jitters. Suddenly you are back at where you are before that you can’t quite understand why you’re feeling happy, when you should have been angry in the first place, then to feel suddenly as if nothing happens. The hurt and pain you’ve felt just evaporated in thin air. You hold on to your pride, to your anger, to your betrayal, to your hurt but only to hold unto it in vain. Because loving breaks barriers, heals all your pain and makes you hope again that maybe this time around love will come to stay. Since in reality we can’t resist the temptation to open our heart again to the one we love.

PS. written May 30, 2008 for md